Yes, I Am A Secret Agent of God

17 Feb

Today, Catholics celebrate Ash Wednesday. The name came from the practice of placing ashes on the foreheads of Catholics as a sign of repentance. As the priest in the homily tonight pointed out, it is when all Catholics are exposed, makes you feel holy and compels you to do good because that humbling sign on your forehead is screaming “Hey you are Catholic! Why are you going to that night club? Shame on you!” That sort of stuff.

So, on this day, seeing a guy eating a humongous order of steak with a charcoal-painted cross on their forehead is a big, big, crazy, MISTAKE.

I am no saint. I barely go to church. The last time I went to a mass was during the mass offered by the place I work to all the employees/relatives of employees in our department who are sick or has passed away.

That mass was last November. I’m not even sure, maybe it was the first week of December? Maybe. So imagine how frequent I say hello to the Lord in church. Even worse, when the priest said in his Ash Wednesday homily tonight:

There are some Catholics who are secret agents of God.

They are those who go to church during their birthday, Christmas, New Year, Holy Week, and on Ash Wednesday where they are compelled to do their Christian duties. They are the secret agents of God.

Imagine how I  squirm from where I stand because what the priest said was just spot on, digging through my chest. Hell, I don’t even go to church during my birthday. And that sarcasm, was just what I need to rethink things and try to remember why the hell was I too busy to hang out with Him for an hour.

I don’t know why is it so hard. It is shameful to admit that sometimes I feel lazy to go to church. Maybe that’s why there are no upward trends in my “life statistics”, just steady, boring, steady, flatline flow. Can He help me with all these confusion that I am having to where I am going? I am sure He have the answers.

Now, I resolve to go to church once a week. Probably Wednesday before I go home. Time to keep in touch again with the Man.

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